


Why we leave the past behind

by kara-danvers-lena-luthor (Mesk)



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Gen, Tumblr Ask Box Fic, Verbal Abuse, drunk eliza, people keep asking me sad things
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-28
Updated: 2017-09-28
Packaged: 2019-01-06 09:51:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 756
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12208827
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mesk/pseuds/kara-danvers-lena-luthor
Summary: Written in reply to this ask I got on tumblr: "Alex, what was the most hurtful thing that Eliza has ever told you, and what was your response to it?"We take a flashback to a few nights after Jeremiah was declared dead.





	Why we leave the past behind

It had been a few days since they got the news, and only a couple of days since they had buried an empty casket.

Life seemed to go by at a different pace now; school was all but a blur, and Alex absolutely hated the pitiful looks and the soft way people seemed to talk to her now, as if she was too fragile, as if she would break if they spoke normally to her.

And at home it was as if time came to a complete stop. The stillness and silence of the house irked Alex; she was used to her home being vibrant with the coming and going of her parents, with Kara’s cartoons playing lowly on the TV, with her friends screaming her name outside the house inviting her to go surf. Now the doorbell only rang if people wanted to come by and offer her mother their condolences; and Kara kept mostly to her own room not knowing how to deal with what was happening.

Alex dove into her school work, and her extra curricular activities– at least those were familiar, they continued to be the same; her homework didn’t treat her differently, and when she was swimming or practicing Tae Kwon Do she could use her anger and grief to fuel her, to push her harder, to be better.

One afternoon, Alex had to walk home from swimming practice, because her mother never showed up to pick her up. Dropping her bag in her room, Alex carefully opened her parents’ door only to find her mother sobbing in bed, cradling a bottle of her father’s favorite whiskey.

“Mom?” Alex called lowly. “Are you okay?”

Eliza had always been warm, a woman Alex admired even if they didn’t see eye-to-eye often; but her mom is a smart woman who dedicated her life to science and to her family which was something Alex always respected; it was hard for her to see her mom so distraught.

“Am I okay?” Eliza scoffed, and by the way her face was flushed, and the way she slurred her words, Alex could tell her mother was drunk; something she had never seen before. “What kind of question is that, Alexandra?” Eliza got up from the bed, losing her footing for a second, almost falling before recovering herself.

Alex wanted to go to her mother, she wanted to help her, but she was rooted in place, unable to move; panic like she had never felt before turned her stomach into ice.

“A-All we asked– all we asked you to do was keep an eye on her.” Eliza stumbled on her own words, as she stalked forward; but Eliza kept a safe distance between her and her daughter, and yet still, Alex could smell the alcohol on her. “Aaaall we asked,” the word was said with a bite, “was for you to keep her out of trouble.”

Tears started rolling down Alex’s cheeks, and she furiously wiped them off, not wanting to let her mother get to her; but guilt set her heart off, making it beat faster than a hummingbird’s, it beat so fast Alex thought it was going to stop.

“But you couldn’t do that, could you, Alexandra?” Alex flinched at the way her name was spat out. “You had to go flying with her, didn’t you?”

“I-I’m s-sorry, m-mom.” Alex choked out, still wiping her tears. 

“Sorry doesn’t cut it now….” A sob broke through Eliza, and the same happened to Alex. She watched her mom stumble back into bed, leaving the bottle on her night table. “W-We thought we had raised you better…” Eliza mumbled, curling herself up. “…It’s your fault he’s gone…”

Alex sobbed again, but she made herself move. She tucked her mom in, and in a split-second decision, she took the half-empty bottle of whiskey with her.

That night it was the first night Alex drank, the first time she got drunk, and the last time she let anyone call her Alexandra.

In the middle of the night, Kara took the bottle back to Eliza’s room so she wouldn’t scold Alex the next day, and she helped Alex while she threw up. 

Taking Alex back to her room, Kara held her sister as she wept drunkenly, cooing softly in her ear that it wasn’t Alex’s fault, that things were going to be okay, that she was there, and she would never leave Alex. 

Alex fell asleep that night clutching Kara’s shirt, letting her new sister’s soft reassurances start mending her broken heart.


End file.
